Friday, May 13, 2011

Being a Stay at home mom and keeping a good house just doesn't count as work.

"Will you ever be going back to work do you think?" I was asked by a friend. I know she didn't mean anything by it (being a mom herself) but it was a little insulting.  Even other mothers don't appreciate what they do.  
I love being home with Garrett.  Before he was born I worked customer service/tech support jobs and while I liked what I did I most often spent my day getting screamed at by people who didn't understand and didn't want to calm down enough to let me explain anything to them.  

While being with Garrett all day can be frazzling sometimes I also find it very rewards.  After he cries he wants a hug, he never asks to speak to my supervisor and he has yet to call me a bitch because his Valium was not covered by Medicare.  
And it is work, I don't stop.  Garrett is non stop all day.  Add laundry (ours, Garrett's and diapers), dishes, cleaning, making the bed, walking the dog, crafting projects and cooking and I'm not left with much time.  At least when I worked "full time" (because we all know parenting is a part time job /sarcasm) I had time to shower and do my hair and makeup every morning.  I had personal time for knitting, crafting, going out with Ben, hanging out with friends and even time to go shopping for myself without being rushed.  

It's a little frustrating that so many people in the world don't think being a mom is "work".  I know I don't get paid.  The benefits are very different from what I would get from a "recognized" job.  As I was typing that last line Garrett decided to show me some of the amazing benefits I get at my  "job"

Garrett giving mommy a kiss
Kisses without getting in trouble with HR
Will I continue to stay at home when Garrett is in school full time?  I don't know.  I like the idea of being an involved PTA mom who crafts and write a blog.  Ben and I are also working on our GranolaStrolla business and I'd really love to spend time working on that as well.  
Anyone who thinks being a stay at home parent isn't a job/career is wrong.  I work just as other people do, I just get different pros and cons.  Work is work and the pay isn't always monetary but the bonuses and rewards are just as sweet to me.


Woz said...

 What a great picture! It made me giggle that you wouldn't get in trouble with HR for the kisses because that's oh so true! (My hubby and I work for the same company and got called into their office one day for holding hands coming back from lunch one day...good grief).

You not only work full time as a stay at home mama (I know you know this), but you also work overtime. Goodness, do you ever stop working?! So many people (yes, even other moms) don't understand this, but I would be a stay at home mama to our little pickle if I could. Oh yes, in a heartbeat because I feel like I miss so much during the day. :(

Julie said...

 Ugh, I hate comments like that. I just tell people, imagine you had to live at your job. That you never get to clock off. That even during your coffee break, you're making mental lists of all the things you see that need to be done. I work harder at home with one kid than I did in a classroom with 30!

Garrett is just precious, btw!

Dana K said...

I am far more tired than I ever was working a "real" job.  This job is 24/7, no vacation, no sick leave...but you're right about the perks.

Granted, I got a lot of snuggles when I worked in animal rescue, but these snuggles are a little better.  ;-)

Great post.

teawithfrodo said...

 I know my friend didn't mean anything by it, being a SAHM herself, but I've seen so many people who feel this way.  It doesn't make any job less legitimate. 

teawithfrodo said...

 And usually we're both sick at the same time so that makes it really rough.  But so worth it.

Carri said...

I hate when people say things like that. It IS work... hard work! Cute picture. :)

bruna myers said...

People always say the dumbest things, even friends. Don't let it bother you. You do what's best for you and your family and nothing else matters. I think it's wonderful to be able to stay home and raise your kids in today's world. Kuddos to you!

Added myself to your Google Friends:)))

suitcasefulloftricks said...

I work 40 hours and I ALWAYS think it would be more work to stay at home with my 3. But I think a smooch like that one would make it worth it to anyone. Isn't he adorable?

Sarah Rice said...

People ask me that ALL. The. Time.
Like being at home with my 4 kids isn't MORE than a "full time" job?! UGH!
But seriously, there's no way I'd want to attempt mommyhood PLUS a 40 hr (or 20 hr!)  a week job outside my house. I'd be WAY out of balance and something would have to give... and I'm pretty sure it'd be my parenting! I know some women who are amazingly great at juggling like that. I don't think I'm one of them.
I'm busy enough as it is!